More college football bowls were played this week in an effort to make more money for ESPN, sponsors, and the school themselves. Of the 40 bowl games that have been played this year, only two mattered, the semi-final games that are still referred to as bowl games only to make a shit load of money. The other 4 games that make up the artificial New Year’s Six, no matter how exciting, have been devalued due to the playoff system. Let’s discuss the two games that actually had consequences first:

Peach Bowl – #4 Washington vs. #1 Alabama

I watched the entirety of both semi-final games and without the aid of food, booze, and company of my friends, I would have fallen asleep. Slow defensive games aren’t always hard to watch, but the Washington/Alabama match up was. Alabama is clearly the better team but their offense was halted due to Washington’s great defense and poor play by Alabama QB Jalen Hurts. Bo Scarborough made two amazing TD runs to put the struggling crimson tide in the lead.

The pass by Jake Browning early in the game to put Washington up 7 – 0 was the only highlight for the Huskies. From that point on Browning couldn’t do anything but throw interceptions and complete a successful punt.

Lane Kiffin was let go by Alabama after the game. The press release and comments from Kiffin state it was a mutual agreement between both sides to allow Kiffin to start working as head coach for FAU. Rumors and inside information revealed that players went to Saban after the game and said Kiffin was halfway out the door prompting the early departure. To replace him as offensive coordinator is notorious alcoholic and booger eater, Steve Sarkisan.

Fiesta Bowl – #3 Ohio State vs. #2 Clemson

At least Washington scored in their game. Ohio State was shut out by Clemson, the first time an Urban Meyer coached team didn’t score a point. One of the two noteworthy things from this game is that a defensive player for Clemson grabbed Ohio States running backs junk and stuck a finger in his butt (featured image). The other being the zero celebration enforcing ref. Every time Deshaun Watson scored, a referee ran up to him shouting “no!” before Watson could complete a harmless celebration.

Other Games

The only other bowl games that I watched were the West Virginia/ Miami, Arkansas/Virginia Tech, and USC/Penn State. Miami beat West Virginia handedly leaving a lot of time for the commentators to discuss other topics during of the game. The players sitting out bowl games discussion quickly became a tame episode of First Take between the two commentators and side line reporter. After a few minutes of enduring the debate I muted the game. This bowl win was Miami’s first since 2006.

I tuned into the Arkansas/Virginia Tech game early in the third quarter when Arkansas was leading 24 – 7. Several turnovers by Arkansas and big plays by VT lead to a final score of 35 – 24 with Virginia Tech winning. I always enjoy a good comeback even if it comes from a team who has a tight end with the words God’s Gift tattooed on the back of his arms.

The Rose Bowl between USC and Penn State was a fun high scoring game that ended with USC winning by a score of 52-49. Even I enjoyed the highest scoring Rose Bowl in history despite it being meaningless. Penn State was getting crushed in the first half but came out strong in the second creating a big lead of their own. USC fought back with the help of their cold blooded freshman QB Sam Darnold. The throws that he made in high pressure situations were insane.

Saquon Barkley had the best Rose Bowl game for a Penn State running back ever. His 79 yard touchdown run in the first quarter is one of the best in recent memory. Wide receiver Chris Godwin made several circus catches and at one point Penn State scored 4 touchdowns on 4 straight offensive plays. Darnold matched Penn States fire power with a rose bowl record 5 touchdown passes and according to USC head coach Clay Helton, god looked over the team.

The field for the Rose Bowl was in terrible condition. It was slick with loose grass which was further messed up by the half time show with the weirdly dressed marching bands. Players had a hard time gaining traction and had to change to more suitable cleats during the game. USC defensive back Adoree Jackson turned his ankle (which looked like a blown out knee) due to the field conditions taking him out of the game. The fact that an exploitative game only in existence to make money had such terrible field conditions that caused injury to an unpaid player is super messed up.

Some genius producer at ESPN thought it would be a good idea to bring 88 year old Keith Jackson into the booth to yuk it up with Kirk Herbstreet and Chris Fowler. The inaudible old man could barely speak and the conversation reminded me of how I talk to my grandpa in public. God it was so awkward.

That is about it. Jake Butt tore his ACL in a close Orange Bowl loss to Florida State, and Western Michigan’s undefeated season was ended at the hands of Wisconsin.

There is only one college football game left, the championship game between Alabama and Clemson on Monday, January 9th.